What Happens When Dad is Missing?


I’m convinced Father’s Day is the most disrespected day of the year.”  This was posted on the Facebook wall of a friend of mine recently.  The comment sparked a slew of comments about it, and the reason it may, or may not be true (depending upon who you ask).

The comments to this Facebook post were split pretty evenly.  Some were in agreement.  Some were in agreement, but said it was deserved because of fathers who are not active in their kids’ lives.  Others, didn’t agree with the statement.

I am not so sure either way.  But what I do know is fathers are important.  When a dad is in the home, and active in his kids’ lives it has a very positive impact.  On the flip side, when dad is missing, or not active in his kids’ lives the results are very different.

It is time to restore fatherhood

Leading up to this Father’s Day there is a movement.  ThisisFatherhood.com has started a movement to restore America’s commitment to fatherhood.  In doing so, they hope to create better environments for children in order to give them better opportunities to succeed.

I am all for that!  One of the hopes for my site is to help family leaders, specifically dads, lead better.  To help you be a better dad and husband.  I hope when you read my posts, you realize how important you are as a dad.  ThisisFatherhood.com has captured this in a short video promoting their fatherhood movement.

What happens to kids when dad is missing?

The video features Christian Hip-Hop artist, Lecrae.  Lecrae comes from a fatherless home, but is determined to not repeat this with his kids.  While watching the video I pulled out 4 things that happen when dad is missing.  Read my four points, watch the video below, and join the fatherhood movement.

  1. Am I significant?  Kids who do not have dad around, question whether they are significant.  Especially boys.
  2. Trying to fill the void.  When dad is missing kids attempt to fill the void.  Sometimes with things that are detrimental.
  3. Painful respect.  Even when you are absent or discouraging as a dad, you are respected.  Misusing this respect causes pain.
  4. Extreme behavior.  Similar to filling the missing dad void, a kid may lash out with destructive behavior as a result.

The song playing in the background of the video above is Lecrae’s, Just Like You.  The song and video do a great job of depicting what happens when dad is missing.

Do your kids want to be just like you?

I love the video, because the hook makes me think of my sons, and how they try to be just like me.  They continually do what I do.  While I observe them being like me, I am thankful.  I’m glad I am a part of their lives and I am not missing.  You should feel the same about yourself and the active role you play in your kids lives.

Question:  What ways can dads be more active in their kids lives?

photo credit: quinn.anya via photopin cc

Jun 10, 2013