I say “I love you” to my wife every single day, without fail. But I’m not sure my words always line up with my actions. If I’m completely honest with myself, I have to admit I have a ways to go when it comes to loving my wife the way she should be loved.
It’s much easier to say “I love you,” than it is to actually love her, not because she is unlovable, but because I simply fall short in this area. All of us do, but it doesn’t mean we stop trying to love our wives in the greatest way possible.
In the video above spoken word artist, Brent Price, expresses his prayer to love his wife in the best way he can. What he shares is a model for the greatest way to love your wife, a crucifixion love. A model that we, husbands, should strive for when it comes to our wives.
I know we’ll never be perfect, but why not come as close as we can. Here are three reasons we should strive to have a crucifixion love for our wives.
Because you gave your word
Most traditional wedding vows include this sentence, “I promise to love you unconditionally.” If for nothing else other than the fact we gave our word, we should strive to love her unconditionally.
Honoring our word, even when it is hard or hurts us is one of the “manliest” things we can do. Our wives will love when we “man up” in this area, and they will trust us in all other areas because we do.
Because it’s the greatest thing we can do for our kids
Our kids and family benefit greatly when we love our wives better. When our son sees their mothers being loved by us it can change the trajectory of their lives for the better.
When our daughters see their mothers being loved unconditionally by us, she will feel loved and safe too. Our kids will be able to experience what love really looks like, therefore they can be loving to you, your wife, their siblings and others.
Because we are called to
Our call as husbands is to love our wives as Christ loved the church. We are called to give ourselves up for our wives. We’re not called to lord over them, we are called to lead them as servant leaders.
That means when there comes a choice between your desire and her desire, her desire comes first. That love is a selfless, sacrificial, and perfect love. It’s the call you accepted when you said, “I do.”
[callout]The way we love our wives impacts every other area of our lives.”Click to tweet this quote[/callout]
The way you love your wife impacts every area of your life. If all else fails around you, and you have a loving relationship with your wife, you can withstand it. When things are going well and you’re not loving your wife the way you should, it’s not as sweet.
I encourage you to not just talk about it, but to live out the greatest way to love your wife.
Hey thanks so much for your post. I have just come from a break-up with my fiance and the root cause was though he told me he loved me, his actions were not mirroring his words. His Dad walked out of them when he was quite young and he has not learnt how to show a woman love. I could not stand it anymore and therefore had to leave. He is a nice guy but having grown up in a very stable family, I know what it means to show love to a spouse (aka my mum and dad).
Continue preaching this to all men out there. Good job!
I’m sorry to hear that. While it may hurt, and be hard, it may be best that this happened prior to marriage. Thanks for sharing, for your encouragement.
Hey Jackie. Thanks for this. It’s my two-year anniversary today, and I was just thinking about how far short of 1 Cor. 13 my love for my wife falls. It’s kind of crazy, you know, just how agape love raises the bar far above just about anything we’ve ever seen or known.
To me, the best way I can love my wife is to keep intentionally growing my love for her each day. The calling is too high to ever settle.
Off to go biking with the wife on a sunny October day here in Kyrgyzstan. 🙂
Hey Ed! My pleasure, thank your for sharing and joining the conversation.
Yes, the agape love bar is something that we won’t reach here, but it’s inspiration to get as close to it as we possibly can.
I hope you enjoyed your biking, that sounds fun! It’s fall here, and today it’s rainy and a little cold. 🙁 We’ll be daydreaming about biking. lol
And HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!! 🙂
Thaaaanks! We last-minute canceled the bike trip, but we’re saving the idea for later. It’s not particularly warm here, either, ha, and my wife got “cold feet” 🙂
Still had an awesome time – she baked us pizzas, we had some friends over, and I sent her on a short game around the house collecting bananas and clues (an offline version of an Android game she likes, haha) that led to flowers, balloons, chocolates, and her “cotton anniversary” gift.
btw, the Date Night in a Box book is terrific! Thanks for such a great resource. 🙂
That sounds like an awesome date! Very creative w/the offline Android game. I like it! That may be added to DNIB version 2! 😉
Hah! Nice, glad you like it! Let me know when DNIB 2 is coming 😉
That was simply in one word….powerful!
Reminded me how much I need to grow in this area.
Thank you.
K
Agreed, we all need to grow in this area. Thanks for sharing, Khaldoun.
Many think that loving is simple. It is a tough calling bro! I am blessed with the most awesome woman that is my wife. She is caring an loving. But sometimes I blow it! I forget how to love her and become selfish in my words, thoughts and actions. But when I remember my vow to love her, I have the courage to go back and ask for her forgiveness. She stands by me, no matter what. Loving her includes making hard decisions like letting go of my ego. When I see how much secure our kids are in the knowledge that I love their mother, it inspires me to love her even more! Loving my wife is priceless…
Priceless indeed, my friend. Thanks for contributing to the conversation.
Challenging, but inspiring post. “If all else fails around you, and you have a loving relationship with your wife, you can withstand it.” So true! Thanks Jackie.
My pleasure. And yes, challenging, but something to shoot for. Thanks for joining the conversation Troy.