Why We Need More Redeemed Families Instead of Perfect Families


Last night my wife and I went to see Irreplaceable the Movie. Irreplaceable is a Focus on the Family documentary directed by Tim Sisarich about family, and how it has seemingly lost its meaning in our modern culture. After watching a few YouTube trailers about it, I thought I had a pretty good idea of what it was going to be about.

My assumption was it was going to document the important, almost irreplaceable role that father’s play in family. It was about that, but it was so much more! There were so many things that jumped out at me that I can’t even begin to mention them all in one blog post.

A profound impact

It impacted both my wife and I in a major way. It had her crying during the movie and every so often saying “hmm” and “yes” and “Lord.” It had me almost completely silent on the drive home as I was pondering what I’d just seen and heard.

My journey as a husband and dad is much like Tim Sisarch’s journey in the movie. He has noticed the things wrong in society today, and the dangers they pose to our families now and in the future. And he’s since started to try to protect his family from these things in the way he related to his wife and kids, and the way he raises his kids.

But what he found out along the way, is he can’t protect them from all of this. And many times his attempts at protecting them is contributing to the problem. His family is just as dysfunctional and broken as all the other families in our world, and he is just as much a part of the problem as other dads, whether involved or not involved in their children’s lives.

My family is broken too and needs help

What he discovered is that every single last one of our families is broken. The world around us is broken, and we can’t protect or create this perfect environment resulting in the perfect situation to create a perfect family. Every family, no matter how it’s defined, is in need of redemption.

Redemption/Redeem (definition): 1. compensate for the faults or bad aspects of; 2. gain or regain possession of in exchange for payment, or clearing a debt; 3. the action of saving or being saved from sin, error or evil

Each family is jacked up in some way. My family, your family, your neighbor’s family, your Pastor’s family, every family. And that is okay. That is what my struggle has been. For years I’ve thought I could control the outcome, control the environment, and even control the actions surrounding my family.

Finally free to be a redeemed family

This movie completely freed me from that. My family is broken from top to bottom, and the generations of my family that follow will be broken as well. So, while we will never be the perfect family, we can and will be the redeemed family.

I’m writing this today not just for my readers, but for myself. To encourage us all to throw the perfect family idea to the wind, and embrace the redeemed family model. One where spouses and parents make mistakes. Where kids disobey and rebel. Where society’s pressures impact our families in sometimes negative ways.

But at the end of the day, we are forgiving of one another, we are supportive, and most of all loving of one another. Hopefully you are encouraged by this and are also freed from the pressures and thoughts that your family doesn’t measure up to the perfect family. Now you can be the family God created you to be. An imperfect, yet redeemed family.

Do you feel you are free to be an imperfect family? If so, say “yes” in the comment section below. If you’d like to discuss in more detail, send me an email and let’s talk more.

May 7, 2014