My wife and I were just talking the other day after a few days of hard rain how our grass had just shot up. It seemed like I just mowed it, but a few days later it looked longer than before I cut it. Our grass has been thriving this summer.
We were thinking back to the past couple summers how our grass was brown, dry, and withered by the time August came. But this season is not the case. I’m mowing the lawn like crazy as it’s green and growing. It brings to mind a quote I read from Gary Chapman…
“All of us blossom when we feel loved and wither when we do not feel loved.”– Gary Chapman
Blossoming or withering?
The rain has been the equivalent of feeling loved for our lawn. The sun is beneficial, but without the rain, it is harsh and can drain the life out of our lawn. This made me think of my wife, and whether she is blossoming or withering.
And which role am I playing in this?
Am I playing the role of the scorching, draining, and blistering sun, thus making her feel unloved?
Or am I playing the rain of the refreshing, life-giving, and rejuvenating rain?
Helping her blossom
I’m certain every husband reading this desires to be refreshing, life-giving, and rejuvenating to our wives. I do, but I admit I’m sometimes scorching, draining, and blistering. Over time and through plenty of ups and downs in our marriage, I have some insight into ways we can help our wives blossom and feel loved.
Here are 5 ways to help your wife blossom.
- Fall down for her. Since we married I’ve been on the long journey of selfishness to selflessness. It’s been a long one, and I’m still on it (sometimes I go backward!). The rain falls from the clouds to the ground, if it stayed in the clouds it couldn’t water our lawn. Just the same when I fall down or give up what I want for what she wants and what is best for her, that is life-giving and loving.
- Present her beauty. I’ve heard many spouses talk about their spouses to other people. Or worse intentionally put down their spouses. Instead of presenting the bad side of our wives we should present and highlight their beauty. No, our wives are not perfect, but there are some amazing and beautiful things about them that we should bring to light.
- Help her present her beauty. The Dove commercials about a year ago showed how women can sometimes have a negative view of themselves. As her husband, I want to build her up and help her to be comfortable in her own skin. No matter if our wives have gained weight, added some wrinkles, or just don’t look like they used to, we need to let them know why they are beautiful to us, and help them to see it too.
- Love her like you love you. Open the door for her. Pull out her chair. Clean up her plate and dishes after dinner. Rub her back. Pick up her bag and bring it to the bedroom. Love your wife like you love yourself, except better.
- Wrap your arms around her. A real good rain will leave puddles. Some of those puddles surround a blade or some blades of grass. We should do the same. Wrap our loving, protecting and providing arms around our wives. Cuddle before and after intimacy. Grab her hand. Look at her intently in her eyes when you kiss her versus the customary peck. Let her know with your embrace that she is loved and loved well.
Study your wife. Is she blossoming or withering? Is she drained or is she full of life?
Then look in the mirror. What role are you playing in this? Put into practice the things mentioned above and my bet is you will help your wife blossom no matter how hot the circumstances are in her life.
[reminder]What is one thing that you’ve done or can do to help your wife blossom?[/reminder]
Thanks for another post to add to my growing list of resources to build my marriage. I have been convicted lately about cherishing my wife and this post has some helpful nuggets to get me back on the right track.
You got it, Devin!
Jackie, I like #1. Like you, I’m still on that journey, but it’s the single greatest thing that keeps our marriage thriving.
Indeed, Jon. Thanks for sharing!